I love these! Stupid or not, Question of the Day is one of the things I miss the most about Vox, after my awesome neighbourhood. Oh, WordPress, I am much more impressed by you now.
With a choice between the two (and since “learn to surf” isn’t an option), I’m definitely mountain climbing. Please. You’re asking me to pick between having sherpas carry my shit for me up a mountain and the possibility of losing fingers but being lauded as a heroine instead of a dumbass vs POOING MYSELF.
People who run marathons poo themselves. They will pee while running and there are thousands of people nearby watching this. I’m sure I’m going to poo myself one of these days (not a sickie poo myself but a full on old person poo myself) but I’m hoping it’s in a nursing home where I’ve paid them good money to wipe my bum. It will not be in front of some snot nosed kids who’ll take pictures and put it online.
Seriously, have you seen the picture of the skinny guy who pooed himself while running a marathon? That is DISGUSTING. It’s all over his thighs. It also looks like sticky baby poo. I don’t even want to know what he ate that morning.
Climb a mountain? People think I’m awesome. If I lose fingers because of the cold? I’m even more awesome. If I have to cut off my fingers like that guy who wandered off the beaten track and had to cut off his own arm (never do that, please. Those people suck)? SOMEONE MAKES A MOVIE ABOUT ME.
No one makes a movie about a woman pooing herself. Except in Bridesmaids and that was just a scene, not the whole movie.
Really, it’s a choice between having a movie made about you or pooping yourself. The answer’s clear. Poo is a no go.